songs

I was in a band. It is now defunct. But it was great while it lasted. I was the designated drummer. I could play the guitar but was not talented enough.

Anyway, nothing beats going into a studio and just jam. It's like you're in a different world all of a sudden. While the outside view this bunch of people as jokers posing as weezer we, at least me, really feel like we were weezer. Or whoever band that we were covering.

Anyway, songs trigger memory.

That's why I'm listing songs/lyrics that will definetely remind me of the member of #teamhafdzuan

1. Hadzim Faeiq

Creed - with arms wide open

Well I just heard the news today
It seems my life is going to change
I close my eyes, begin to pray
Then tears of joy stream down my face

With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
With arms wide open

Well I don't know if I'm ready
To be the man I have to be
I'll take a breath, I'll take her by my side
We stand in awe, we've created life

With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Now everything has changed
I'll show you love
I'll show you everything

With arms wide open
With arms wide open
I'll show you everything ...oh yeah
With arms wide open..wide open

[Guitar Break]

If I had just one wish
Only one demand
I hope he's not like me
I hope he understands
That he can take this life
And hold it by the hand
And he can greet the world
With arms wide open...

With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Now everything has changed
I'll show you love
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
With arms wide open

I'll show you everything..oh yeah
With arms wide open....wide open 

*The ones in red will see me sing with man tears streaming down my face.

Why this song?

It's just a powerful, promising, brave song that really describe exactly how a father wants his boy to be. Brave and ready to take whatever bullshit the world has to offer.


2. Hadfina Farwizah

John Mayer - Daughter

I know a girl,
She puts the color inside of my world
But she's just like a maze
Where all of the walls all continually change

And I've done all I can
To stand on her steps with my heart in my hands
Now I'm starting to see
Maybe it's got nothing to do with me

CHORUS
Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

Oh, you see that skin?
It's the same she's been standing in
Since the day she saw him walking away
Now she's left, cleaning up the mess he made

CHORUS
Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

Boys, you can break
You'll find out how much they can take
Boys will be strong and boys soldier on
But boys would be gone without warmth from
A woman's good, good heart

On behalf of every man
Looking out for every girl
You are the god and the weight of her world

CHORUS
Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too
So mothers, be good to your daughters too
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

Why this song?

 

 It's scary when it comes to daughters as most father are clueless. And will be even more so when they grow up. Well that's how hollywod movies potrays the situation.

really sums it up. Even though we are clueless most or all of the time, at least , I hope, I'll be the weight of her world forever.

3. Farah

 

U2 - All I want is you

You say you want diamonds on a ring of gold
You say you want your story to remain untold.
All the promises we make
From the cradle to the grave
When all I want is you.

You say you'll give me a highway with no-one on it
Treasure, just to look upon it
All the riches in the night.

You say you'll give me eyes in the moon of blindness
A river in a time of dryness
A harbour in the tempest.
All the promises we make, from the cradle to the grave
When all I need is you.

You say you want your love to work out right
To last with me through the night.

You say you want diamonds on a ring of gold
Your story to remain untold
Your love not to grow cold.
All the promises we break, from the cradle to the grave
When all I want is you.
 

Why?

Even bono dedicated this to her wife. A bit morbid using the word grave but that's how reality is. This song has the eternity feel to it. with broken and kept promises the important thing is well "you".

 

 This is how i interpret these songs and how they relate to those important to me. 

 

Hell, i could be way off.

 

 

anyway, I got some other song for other settings. Songs does not only trigger my memory of people but also events etc. Will put some more on that.

 

So these songs will definetely be in my playlists forever as will my memory of #teamhafdzuan.

typical new year post

2012

it's just numbers. Nothing changed. My goals didn't change. the world didn't end.

It's hard to see small changes. But looking back. yup, things did change. And they change because it was acted upon.

And these changes were not part of a resolution list set on 1st January 2012. They were just things that I thought should've been done anyway. Just that I was so caught up with all these distractions. Distractions that i and many couldn;t live without. And most of it were selfish self fullfilling things that takes and demand a lot.


for 2013,

I decided to pass the opportunity to suffer for 5 hrs + in this year's edition of the KL marathon. THe far I'll go is the half marathon. I'm sure missus is gonna do another 10k.

I'm gonna do pd tri and desaru tri. will probably bring along the whole #teamhafdzuan this time round.

nothing much, in fact i think i regressed, cutting down the distance.

it takes far too long to recover from a marathon and it disrupts other things.

work will not change much as the people/environment would probably NOT change.

so will probably focus on my own circle of influence.

maybe blog more during office hours.


a lot was achieved but they're just milestones to the ultimate goal. But it's good to have milestones to measure up against.

2012 Ironman World Championship, Kona

China

Chengdu to be exact. Took me 5 hrs from KL to Beijing. 3 hours layover then 3 more hours to Chengdu.
You know it's cold when even the locals put on heavy duty jackets. And I'm like I'll put mine on a bit later. My advice, do what the locals do because they know what they're doing.
sitting next to a lady who spent 70% of the time facing the puke bag also made the journey a memorable one!
once arrived I got picked up by a beat up car. Got to the hotel and discovered Something I had never seen before during my travel. A freaking desktop Computer in a hotel room.

I just got a call asking for massage. By that I know by their standard 11pm is already late.

miss home and family.

happy birthday fina.

Daddy

Hadzim and Hadfina

something new

Im writing this (literally) using my new phone. These smartphones are awesome to say to the least.

Some short review of what's happening lately.

1. Another reality check at the recent power man. But at least it helps enhance my reality of where I stand in terms of my preparation and performance in a race.

2. Recovery! A holiday at Bali isn't such a bad recovery plan.

now it's back to plan for hext year.

DA man

a guy, who knows nothing, suddenly says bad things with reference to you.

I know he was trying to generalize but it was at my expense.

He didn't even bother trying to find out the real situation.

I was not mad, in fact, I felt sorry for the guy because at this rate he'll have a hard time connecting with normal people.

I personally think people are made balanced.

A smart person, might have a persona of a stapler. So to be positive i would say that this deficiency caused them acting awkwardly. Acting bitchy and all. I'm upset afterall.

A charming person on the other hand, might not make the right decisions all the time but is pleasant to talk to. But in a long run, it could prove to be annoying.

Some people need to show they have the brain or hold ome sort of authority. And it has to be reflected by the way they carry themselves. But I think people would know if you have those traits anyways.

Again, feeling sorry for people who think that they have to proof themselves. We know.

Ironman World Championship Kona 2012

http://ironmanworldchampionship.com/

This year will see craig alexander go head to head with chris mccormack. This gotta be great. with pete jacobs and all. its a great pro line up. I wish lance was there to spice things up.

Men
Craig Alexander (AUS)
Andreas Raelert (GER)
Pete Jacobs (AUS)
Cameron Brown (NZL)
Marino Vanhoenacker (BEL)
Sebastian Kienle (GER)
Jordan Rapp (USA)
Timo Bracht (GER)
Jozsef Major (HUN)
Maxim Kriat (UKR)
Chris McCormack (AUS)
Marko Albert (EST)
Luke Bell (AUS)
Faris Al-Sultan (GER)
Frederik Van Lierde (BEL)
Daniel Fontana (ITA)
Dirk Bockel (LUX)
Mike Aigroz (SUI)
Mike Schifferle (SUI)
Petr Vabrousek (CZE)
Audrey Lyatskiy (RUS)
Clemente Alonso-McKernan (ESP)
Ronnie Schildknecht (SUI)
Romain Guillaume (FRA)
Trevor Wurtele (CAN)
David Dellow (AUS)
Matthew Russell (USA)
Joe Gambles (AUS)
Viktor Zyemtsev (UKR)
Eneko Llanos (ESP)
Andi Boecherer (GER)
Paul Matthews (AUS)
Sergio Marques (POR)
Jeremy Jurkiewicz (FRA)
Pedro Gomes (PRT)
Paul Amey (GBR)
Alejandro Santamaria (ESP)
Michael Lovato (USA)
Timothy O’Donnell (USA)
Michael Raelert (GER)
Thomas Thomschke (GER)
Luke McKenzie (AUS)
Trevor Desaut (FRA)
Rasmus Henning (DEN)
Bart Aernouts (BEL)
Cyril Viennot (FRA)
Joshua Rix (AUS)
Tom Lowe (GBR)
Bruno Clerbout (BEL)
Andy Potts (USA)
Christian Brader (GER)
Axel Zeebroek (BEL)
Greg Bennett (AUS)
Women
Caroline Steffen (SUI)
Mirinda Carfrae (AUS)
Leanda Cave (GBR)
Rachel Joyce (GBR)
Mary Beth Ellis (USA)
Meredith Kessler (USA)
Anja Baranek (GER)
Heather Wurtele (CAN)
Linsey Corbin (USA)
Rebekah Keat (AUS)
Amy Marsh (USA)
Joanna Lawn (NZL)
Kelly Williamson (USA)
Gina Crawford (NZL)
Caitlin Snow (USA)
Simone Brandli (SUI)
Sarah Piampiano (USA)
Natascha Badmann (SUI)
Jessica Jacobs (USA)
Sonja Tajsich (GER)
Sofie Goos (BEL)
Tine Dechers (BEL)
Kristin Moeller (GER)
Amanda Stevens (USA)
Michelle Gailey (AUS)
Susan Dietrich (GER)
Erika Csomor (HUN)
Emi Sakai (JPN)
Michelle Vesterby (DEN)
Sara Gross (CAN)
Mareen Hufe (GER)

Desaru Race Summary

Race summary

Input:
Water = approx. 500ml
Glucose = approx. 750ml bike + 55ml run
Power bar performance drink = approx. 750ml
Power gel = 5
Electrolyte pills = 8
Power bar = 1 + 1/2
Bananas = 2

Process:
2km swim, 92km bike, 22km run

Output:
swim time :0:52 (swim pos: 194-60%)
bike time: 3:07:29, avg speed 29.2kmh, avg cadence 68 (bike pos: 122-38%)
run time: 2:25 hrs (123-38%)
Total time: 6:25:46
Pos: overall 115/320 (36%), age group 37/106 (35%)


Any triathlete would agree that it is not as simple as the above

Before i even get to Desaru beach that morning :
1) I've decided to do half-iron distance since last year having gone thru quite few oly distance,
2) I've since committed myself to a training plan (which i got at big badwolf) consisting of run (wed, friday), bike (tue, thu), swim (wed, fri) long run/bike/brick (sat,sun) and this goes on until race day
3) bought a stationary bike trainer so i can ride at home
4) register "warm up" races and commited certain amount of money for the expenses
5) foregone time
6) bought a tri bike
7) bought running shoes
8) experimenting with nutrition

So i guess the quote below captures the spirit of the whole thing so well:

"Commitment is doing the things you said you'd do, long after the mood you said it in has left you." 


Few days after, I was on a high or something. Felt more positive than ever. I just wanted to push more and sign up for longer distances but I know, long after that mood is gone, i'll probably be dragging my feet. so better not.

For me, this is just a starter . I've just finished the kindergarten of triathlon. Now I've graduated to primary triathlon. I know by the end of it, i would not turn pro, but at least i know that, with the resources that i have, i've exploit them all and finally say "this is as good as it gets".

Repeat pain: 4th November 2012 (Powerman, Putrajaya - 11.4km run, 64km bike, 11.4km run)

RECAP

30

Let's start with this:

The only time you really live fully is from thirty to sixty. The young are slaves to dreams; the old servants of regrets. Only the middle-aged have all their five senses in the keeping of their wits.
Hervey Allen

 So it goes without saying that i do somewhat have developed my senses. I owe it not to the increased number rather to the experiences i had especially last few years with my small unit as i love to call them, my loyal fan base, my family. Always there and will always will be there.

The rationale thing to do when you reach a certain milestone in your life is first to examine what you have accomplished. And to a certain extent i did do a lot but in terms of recognition or stuff that normal people gauge you by, not that much.

In terms of filling that hole i never knew existed, that definitely was fulfilled the day i got married. And few more things i did help me feel more alive than ever. and to have such good and great inspiring people around me at work, friends, team mates or wherever along the way was such a blessing.

Though lately i don't see them often or don;t converse like it was in the ol days. I do feel that i owe it to them for the experience.

playing basketball, being a drummer, triathlons, swims, bike run travelling doing all spontaneus stuff all come to my mind.

I did the half ironman couple of days ago and i think that was an accomplishment. not because of the medals, because of the trust i have that one day i will do it. I believe in the journey not the destination mantra. I believe in performance not result. Because the latter will get you that objective.

I was like that, i like taking times learning things, i love just waiting for trains at the ariport. I feel that it is during these time that you test yourself. You find yourself. Patient is one value that is so under rated these days.

Went back to posts going way back to 2007 and realized that, i did a lot, felt a lot of things, a lot of emotions and glad to have it in writing and now having the opportunity to read them again. I wrote lyrics, i posted something that in my age now seems it was done by a stranger.i really was impressed with this guy which is so alive and free.

example:

I think i posted for the semester around near new year time. i think.

My vision was restricted
to some natural beauty
where some took for granted
but at 7.30 am this morning
i'm glad i was there
i'm glad god let me share

the long straight road remind me
of little kids who are so pure
sparkling as mineral water
as naive as those who had passions
only to realize they're just reasons
to gain attention

as i was worrying if i'll ever get home
i sing some as a relief
i put faith first cause i believe
even when sometime faith,
is the thing i constantly leave

when the signboard reveal what i wanted to see
i screamed within
to me its like i win
even if i don't know what or who was the competition

maybe when you hope
and it drives you
to some known destination
you would like to think
that you win.

as for resolutions
that could wait some more
cause i can never be done for
resolutions from before

Is it because you have grown up and you forget that you genuinely had fun. I hope i'll blog more to keep tabs on all emotions and experience felt.

I want to feel that again. To just sit in front of the keyboard and make my milestones in life history.

This is to restart what i love doing in the first place. experiencing stuff and reflecting it later to guide me along the way and to remind myself not to be a corporate bastard in 20 years time!

now i know how jerry mcguire feel at the start of that movie.

desaru hill profile

so, the top one is suppose to be the profile for the 116 Desaru tri bike course
the bottom one is the course i used to train with.

i think i pretty much got the hills covered.

but few more sessions on the trainer to fire up the muscles will ensure a strong start to the run.